A Top Ten List

TOP TEN REASONS OUR MEMBERS CAN’T COME UP WITH A NEW ARTICLE TOPIC TO WRITE ABOUT:

10. There’s not a single topic left to write about. Everything has been said.

9. I am currently satisfied with the amount of traffic I’m getting to my website; why would I want more?

8. Too many visitors makes my website slow down to a crawl or it crashes.

7. Joining a community of 95,000+ Expert Authors frightens me.

6. I hate free services that offer massive benefits and very little drawbacks.

5. The Editorial Review Team won’t accept my PayPal bribe.

4. Submitting keyword-stuffed, computer-generated, spun and re-spun, barely-English PLR articles is a better fit for my marketing strategy. NOT!

3. The idea of (2) REAL HUMANS carefully reviewing my articles makes me blush.

2. I find the 569 niche categories too limiting.

1. The cat knocked my EzineArticles mug over and spilled coffee into my keyboard. My “Enter” key sticks.

Have any additional to add to our list?

25 Comments »


1
Audrey Okaneko writes:

Chris,

You have a delightful sense of humor. I truly have to print this out and put it on my wall. The next time I believe I have nothing left to say, I’ll re read this ten times.

Thanks for the morning smile….and congrats on your expansion into..what was it, the coat closet?

Audrey :)

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 9:03 AM

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2

Love this article and here is my addition to your list. I also plan like Audrey to print it out and hang in on my creation bulletin board.

11. I don’t have time and I don’t need the extra names on my list or the extra traffic to my website.

Have a great rest of your week.
Annie

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 9:13 AM

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3

Audrey,

No, it wasn’t a coat closet. :) It was originally a reception area for the previous tenant. We used it for a marketing staging area.

Soon it will become our Network Admin’s room and then eventually 2 more developers will join them.

What do our Network Admins do? They monitor the servers & network, security, and speed. Ultimately, they are responsible for maintaining 24×7 uptime. Their focus is on the ‘network’ layer whereas the developers focus on writing/testing/improving code.

All,

Thanks & credit goes to Kirk (Editor #15) in Member Support for coming up with the starting list that made up today’s Top 10 list.

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 9:30 AM

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4

That’s hilarious… let’s see, #9, 5 and 1 are my hang ups!

Well, that, and more time… I only have two hands, and I really need at least six.

Thanks for the laugh today!

Love and stuff,
Michy

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 12:04 PM

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5

Nice touch, Kirk & Chris!

Here’s my addition, that I hear from new students of mine ’til I set ’em straight….

12. But why would I want to give away my content for free? (spoken with a whine, of course!)

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 1:15 PM

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6
Cathy Perkins writes:

13. Not only did the cat knock over my EzineArticles mug spilling coffee on the keyboard making the “Enter” key stick, the mug then fell on the floor and broke! I can’t see through my tears and can’t possibly write without it.

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 2:45 PM

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7
Lee Ann Price writes:

Writing articles is just so twenty minutes ago marketing – I’ve heard of this new thing, I think they call it PPC, or is it product launch or adsense or a million other things that hit my inbox daily….

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 2:48 PM

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8
Alejandro Guevara Onofre writes:

I would like to write about other subjects (for example nations of the world, unknown biographies, tourism…wonders of the world, unconvetional diplomacy), but I don’t have much time. I like write about “Olympics”. This year is special for me because…”Olympic Year”: “2008 Beijing Olympic Games! I have some projects…
I remembered that when I was a child I dreamed to become an “Olympic sportspeople”, but I could not realize my dream…
However, I will write on nations of the world, Fidel Castro, dictatorships, democracy, culture, ecology, entertainment, famous women, foreign politics, other sports…next months
Many thanks
Alejandro

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 3:04 PM

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9
Lynne Lee writes:

“Me? Write articles? I’m not a writer.”

I don’t think they’ve heard,

“if you can talk you can write” and
“everyone is an expert to someone” and
“some people will only hear it through you”

I guess that makes it easier for me!

Thanks Chris for, raising a smile.

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 3:17 PM

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10

Alejandro,

I also mildly dreamed of being in the Olympics but having superior athletic talent wasn’t in the cards for me despite my commitment to fitness. I wanted to be a rock star too, but that didn’t work either. ;-)

Every Summer for the past 3 years I’ve been lucky to train at the US Olympic Training Center for a week during Racquetball camp. It’s as close as I’ll ever get to Olympic caliber athletes.

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 3:24 PM

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11
Jane Trevaskis writes:

Chris –
Love your list! Here’s another one for you

Success is overrated! I think I’ll just plod along.

Jane

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 3:26 PM

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12
Alejandro Guevara Onofre writes:

Christopher. Interesting your coment.
Alejandro from Lima, Peru

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 3:56 PM

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13

Cathy, I would have a hard time writing through the tears if my mug broke too… it’s my favorite coffee and tea mug, use it every day.

Chris, do you guys sell the mugs?

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 4:22 PM

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14
vivclark writes:

best top 10 list i’ve seen in a while…thanks!

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 4:27 PM

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15
Kathryn Caywood writes:

Hi, Chris,

I’ve read over your list several times now, trying to come up with #13, and each time I get to #8, I laugh out loud again!

Thanks for providing such a win-win situation for so many people.

Kathryn Caywood

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 4:34 PM

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16
Andrew Poletto writes:

I already have one article up, why wouldn’t that be enough?

Besides,

I can’t find anyone to teach me to write a proper article.

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 7:55 PM

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17

Michelle,

Sorry, not any more… keeps the perceived value of them higher if we don’t sell them. :)

Comment provided April 30, 2008 at 9:02 PM

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18

Happy Birthday to Jeff Herring today.

Comment provided May 1, 2008 at 3:27 PM

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19

Thanks Chris!

Comment provided May 1, 2008 at 10:40 PM

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20
Self-Help writes:

Even if you can’t come up with a new article topic, still come up with an article. Your ideas are unique in comparison to everyone else. We shouldn’t let anything stop us! Good luck.

Comment provided May 3, 2008 at 11:17 PM

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21
Joi writes:

#9, that’s it exactly. Except not.

Thanks for the laughs!

Comment provided May 3, 2008 at 11:39 PM

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22
rome writes:

Hey… those were really kool points.

Probably those were the reasons why i can’t find one….

:)

Comment provided May 5, 2008 at 7:31 AM

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23
Greg writes:

Here’s one for you.

My homepage loads slow enough now with that ezine widget taking forever to load. Why would I want to add to its listing making things worse?

Comment provided May 5, 2008 at 9:21 PM

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24

Great list. I loved #6. I hate free services that offer massive benefits and very little drawbacks. Funny stuff.

Comment provided May 7, 2008 at 12:10 AM

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25
JBondad writes:

Love this list.
I’d like to have problem #8. Really!

Comment provided May 7, 2008 at 9:54 PM

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